Systems & Growth

Why Being Neutral Backfires When You’re Building Something of Your Own

For most of my career, I’ve been proud of being unemotional and analytical. It’s served me well as an operator in a 9-to-5 job. I don’t get rattled easily. I don’t get caught up in drama. And more often than not, I don’t have to take a strong stance on things.

But building my own projects has shown me the downside of this mindset. Suddenly, I have to have opinions.

Do I like this UI or not?
Is this registration process intuitive or not?
Should I keep this button here or move it?

These are decisions only I can make. And yet, because I’m not an expert in design or UX, I’m tempted to delay them. To wait until I feel more certain.

But here’s the truth: delaying decisions is the worst decision of all. Projects stall. Momentum dies.

What I’ve learned is that building isn’t about always being “right.” It’s about being willing to decide, move forward, and adjust later if needed.

The neutrality that helped me succeed in my career doesn’t serve me here. In building, indecision is more dangerous than being wrong.

August 25, 2025

Be Careful What You Wish For

As a 9-to-5er, I used to dream about being my own boss. No one telling me what to do, full freedom, working on my own ideas. It sounded perfect.

Then I actually started building a side project.

And here’s what I didn’t expect: without a boss, I often didn’t know what to do. Figuring out what to work on, before even doing the work, became a whole job by itself. It was exhausting in a way I never imagined.

This wasn’t what I signed up for. Not at all.

It feels like fighting a war with yourself. On one side, there’s the boss version of me—ambitious, focused, wanting results. On the other side, there’s the staff version of me—lazy, easily distracted, always looking for the path of least resistance.

And if I’m not careful, the staff wins. Every time. Because that’s human nature: we want to do as little as possible, whether we’re working for ourselves or for someone else.

So what’s the solution? I think it’s about turning that nature into an advantage. Instead of fighting it, I try to use it as a filter. I ask: What are the few tasks that will actually make the biggest difference?

Then I write them down. I make them non-negotiable.

Because if I don’t, the “lazy staff” in me will always find a way to avoid them.

Being your own boss isn’t about freedom—it’s about discipline. The discipline to make the hard choices, stick to them, and hold yourself accountable when no one else will.

August 22, 2025

The Paradox of Parenting: How Kids Steal Your Time and Give You Perspective

Having kids is a funny thing. On one hand, they eat up every ounce of time you think you have. It’s the easiest excuse in the world—“I didn’t get this done because the kids kept me busy.” And to be honest, it’s not even a bad excuse, because it’s true.

But just like anything else in life, parenting has two sides. If you only look at the side that drains you, you’ll never get anywhere. The trick is finding the positive.

For me, I’ve noticed two big things that stand out.

1. Kids Force Me to Be Strategic With Time

I didn’t realize this until my kids went away to summer camp. Suddenly, I had all this free time. My first thought was, “Finally! I’ll use this time to dive into my projects and catch up on everything I’ve been putting off.”

But that’s not what happened. Instead, I found myself watching movies. Doing random stuff. Basically, wasting the time I thought I needed so badly.

It hit me: it’s not the kids that stop me from working long hours. It’s me. Humans just aren’t built to grind endlessly. If it’s not kids eating my time, it’ll be something else. The only difference is how I feel afterward.

With kids around, I may not have unlimited time, but my days feel full. Without them, I had all the time in the world and ended up feeling empty. That was a wake-up call.

2. Kids Change the Way I Make Decisions

Making decisions is hard. There are always too many angles, and it’s easy to overcomplicate things.

What I’ve started doing is asking myself one simple question: “What do I want my kids to be like when they grow up?”

Do I want them to be disciplined? Curious? Resilient? Skilled in certain areas?

Once I answer that, I try to live it out myself. Because they shouldn’t carry the weight of my unfinished dreams—that’s my job. If I want them to read, I should be reading. If I want them to be disciplined, I should practice discipline. It’s not about telling them what to do, but showing them.

Wrapping It Up

So yeah—having kids takes your time, no question. But it also gives you a perspective you can’t get any other way. They make you treat time with more intention, and they give you a simple filter for making decisions that actually matter.

In a way, parenting doesn’t just shape your kids. It reshapes you.

August 22, 2025

Always Remember: Life (and almost everything in it) isn’t supposed to be linear

The most immature type of thinking is that life is linear.

You put in X amount of work and you get Y amount of results.

Just like in school.

But you are not.

You are in this imperfect society where no one thing determines the result, but a thousand of things. Any one thing has correlation with the final result, but no causation.

And above all, it is okay to zigzag. Don’t get impatient.

I personally have to remind myself on this a lot.

Additionally, results don’t come in fixed time slots periodically. They come in unexpectedly, more often than not. Having expectations will throw you off balance.

The last thing I want to put it out there – something controversial to an extent – is that you should NOT give your 100%, or what them boys like to say, going ALL-IN.

Because the other side of the “ALL-IN” coin is expecting great things to happen. But life doesn’t care if you’ve given 100% or 5%; it’s not about you.

So always give 70%, and expect 5%. This is the only way to keep you going for a long time, even without any visible result.

Nothing makes sense, for a long time, until it does.

Until then, keep at it.

August 21, 2025

Book Notes: How to Succeed in Mr. Beast Production

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top: 4px; left: -1.5rem; display: block; width: 16px; height: 16px; pointer-events: none; content: “”; background-color: #ffffff; border: #adb5bd solid 1px; border-radius: 50%; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-embedPermissions .ml-form-embedPermissionsOptionsCheckbox .label-description::after { position: absolute; top: 0px!important; left: -1.5rem; display: block; width: 1rem; height: 1rem; content: “”; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow .label-description::after { position: absolute; top: 0px!important; left: -1.5rem; display: block; width: 1rem; height: 1rem; content: “”; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .custom-radio .custom-control-label::after { background: no-repeat 50%/50% 50%; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .custom-checkbox .custom-control-label::after, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-embedPermissions .ml-form-embedPermissionsOptionsCheckbox .label-description::after, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-interestGroupsRow .ml-form-interestGroupsRowCheckbox .label-description::after, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow .label-description::after { background: no-repeat 50%/50% 50%; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-fieldRow .custom-control, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow .custom-control { position: relative; display: block; min-height: 1.5rem; padding-left: 1.5rem; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-fieldRow .custom-radio .custom-control-input, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow .custom-radio .custom-control-input, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-fieldRow .custom-checkbox .custom-control-input, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow .custom-checkbox .custom-control-input { position: absolute; z-index: -1; opacity: 0; box-sizing: border-box; padding: 0; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-fieldRow .custom-radio .custom-control-label, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow .custom-radio .custom-control-label, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-fieldRow .custom-checkbox .custom-control-label, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow .custom-checkbox .custom-control-label { color: #000000; font-size: 12px!important; font-family: ‘Open Sans’, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 22px; margin-bottom: 0; position: relative; vertical-align: top; font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-fieldRow .custom-select, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow .custom-select { background-color: #ffffff !important; color: #333333 !important; border-color: #cccccc; border-radius: 4px !important; border-style: solid !important; border-width: 1px !important; font-family: ‘Lucida Sans Unicode’, ‘Lucida Grande’, sans-serif; font-size: 14px !important; line-height: 20px !important; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 0; padding: 10px 28px 10px 12px !important; width: 100% !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; max-width: 100% !important; height: auto; display: inline-block; vertical-align: middle; background: url(‘https://assets.mlcdn.com/ml/images/default/dropdown.svg’) no-repeat right .75rem center/8px 10px; -webkit-appearance: none; -moz-appearance: none; appearance: none; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow { height: auto; width: 100%; float: left; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .ml-input-horizontal { width: 70%; float: left; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .ml-button-horizontal { width: 30%; float: left; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .ml-button-horizontal.labelsOn { padding-top: 25px; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .horizontal-fields { box-sizing: border-box; float: left; padding-right: 10px; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow input { background-color: #ffffff; color: #333333; border-color: #cccccc; border-radius: 4px; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px; font-family: ‘Lucida Sans Unicode’, ‘Lucida Grande’, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 0; padding: 10px 10px; width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box; overflow-y: initial; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow button { background-color: #000000 !important; border-color: #000000; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px; border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: none; color: #ffffff !important; cursor: pointer; font-family: ‘Lucida Sans Unicode’, ‘Lucida Grande’, sans-serif; font-size: 14px !important; font-weight: 700; line-height: 20px; margin: 0 !important; padding: 10px !important; width: 100%; height: auto; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-horizontalRow button:hover { background-color: #1F5014 !important; border-color: #1F5014 !important; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow input[type=”checkbox”] { box-sizing: border-box; padding: 0; position: absolute; z-index: -1; opacity: 0; margin-top: 5px; margin-left: -1.5rem; overflow: visible; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow .label-description { color: #000000; display: block; font-family: ‘Open Sans’, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 0; position: relative; vertical-align: top; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow label { font-weight: normal; margin: 0; padding: 0; position: relative; display: block; min-height: 24px; padding-left: 24px; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow label a { color: #000000; text-decoration: underline; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow label p { color: #000000 !important; font-family: ‘Open Sans’, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif !important; font-size: 12px !important; font-weight: normal !important; line-height: 18px !important; padding: 0 !important; margin: 0 5px 0 0 !important; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow label p:last-child { margin: 0; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-embedSubmit { margin: 0 0 20px 0; float: left; width: 100%; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-embedSubmit button { background-color: #000000 !important; border: none !important; border-radius: 4px !important; box-shadow: none !important; color: #ffffff !important; cursor: pointer; font-family: ‘Lucida Sans Unicode’, ‘Lucida Grande’, sans-serif !important; font-size: 14px !important; font-weight: 700 !important; line-height: 21px !important; height: auto; padding: 10px !important; width: 100% !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-embedSubmit button.loading { display: none; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-embedSubmit button:hover { background-color: #1F5014 !important; } .ml-subscribe-close { width: 30px; height: 30px; background: url(‘https://assets.mlcdn.com/ml/images/default/modal_close.png’) no-repeat; background-size: 30px; cursor: pointer; margin-top: -10px; margin-right: -10px; position: absolute; top: 0; right: 0; } .ml-error input, .ml-error textarea, .ml-error select { border-color: red!important; } .ml-error .custom-checkbox-radio-list { border: 1px solid red !important; border-radius: 4px; padding: 10px; } .ml-error .label-description, .ml-error .label-description p, .ml-error .label-description p a, .ml-error label:first-child { color: #ff0000 !important; } #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow.ml-error .label-description p, #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-checkboxRow.ml-error .label-description p:first-letter { color: #ff0000 !important; } @media only screen and (max-width: 400px){ .ml-form-embedWrapper.embedDefault, .ml-form-embedWrapper.embedPopup { width: 100%!important; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm { float: left!important; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow { height: auto!important; width: 100%!important; float: left!important; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .ml-input-horizontal { width: 100%!important; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .ml-input-horizontal > div { padding-right: 0px!important; padding-bottom: 10px; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-button-horizontal { width: 100%!important; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-button-horizontal.labelsOn { padding-top: 0px!important; } } .ml-mobileButton-horizontal { display: none; } #mlb2-14362371 .ml-mobileButton-horizontal button { background-color: #000000 !important; border-color: #000000 !important; border-style: solid !important; border-width: 1px !important; border-radius: 4px !important; box-shadow: none !important; color: #ffffff !important; cursor: pointer; font-family: ‘Lucida Sans Unicode’, ‘Lucida Grande’, sans-serif !important; font-size: 14px !important; font-weight: 700 !important; line-height: 20px !important; padding: 10px !important; width: 100% !important; } @media only screen and (max-width: 400px) { #mlb2-14362371.ml-form-embedContainer .ml-form-embedWrapper .ml-form-embedBody .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm { padding: 0 0 10px 0 !important; } .ml-hide-horizontal { display: none !important; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-button-horizontal { display: none!important; } .ml-mobileButton-horizontal { display: inline-block !important; margin-bottom: 20px;width:100%; } .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .ml-input-horizontal > div { padding-bottom: 0px !important; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 400px) { .ml-form-formContent.horozintalForm .ml-form-horizontalRow .horizontal-fields { margin-bottom: 10px !important; width: 100% !important; } }

function ml_webform_success_14362371() { var $ = ml_jQuery || jQuery; $(‘.ml-subscribe-form-14362371 .row-success’).show(); $(‘.ml-subscribe-form-14362371 .row-form’).hide(); } fetch(“https://assets.mailerlite.com/jsonp/918262/forms/119754241083442421/takel”)

February 9, 2025